I’ve been told that I have to include two events from my birthday dinner at Mia Cucina. That they weren’t included earlier might be a function of the feverish lurgy, or more likely selective age and alcohol-related memory loss. Here goes…..both were the result of a very large 21st party happening at the restaurant the same evening. And both happened late on in the evening – no surprises there:
Incident the first – my celebration was festooned with one large badge pinned to my frock and announcing that I am 60. The 21st, on the other hand, was festooned, amongst other trimmings, with a large number of helium balloons. A young man of the party inhaled some helium and sang ‘happy birthday’ to the young woman turning 21 in the falsetto voice that emerges if one inhales helium. There are probably some nasty side effects because apparently companies selling helium pumps require you to sign a declaration that you won’t do this before they sell you the stuff. Ignoring his health and welfare, my guests dragged this chap to our table and insisted that he do it all again for me. Of course he didn’t know my name so several much deeper voices filled in the gap. I think my reaction might best be summed up as ‘bemused’.
Incident the second – this one was self-inflicted and therefore much more embarrassing in that way that makes you cringe when recalling it. For some reason I took it into my head that I had something important to say to the 21-year old. What it was has escaped, but no doubt it involved the meaning of life. I do remember accosting her on her way back from the loo and imparting this wisdom. I think she must have been as pissed as me because an embrace followed with the two of us swaying dangerously close to quite a lot of glassware. The saving grace is that I expect never ever to see any of these people again.
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